Finding My Joy Groove

Feeling the negative angst of my last post in which, I wrote about fat acceptance, I decided that I needed to shake that energy from my boots so to speak, and move on to lighter fare. What’s the point in writing about joy if you are going to depress and anger yourself. Might as well start a blog called Jane’s Pain…Good one! I think I’ll copyright that.

The best thing to switch from being angsty to joyful is focusing on the many wonderful little things that occur throughout my day, so in no particular order, here they are.

It's the little things.


My daughter just walked in and indicated that her friends were gaslighting her. I assume from the giggling that the gaslighting was not offensive and told her that was nice of them. Well, based on her reaction, it was the incorrect response, so I asked her what gaslighting was exactly. She indicated that it is when someone makes you question your own perception of reality.

I think my children are gaslighting me.

Grocery Shopping Partner

One of my children has been struggling with their mental health recently so it was really nice today when they declared that they were feeling good and were up for grocery shopping with yours truly. I advise you whenever you have an offer of a grocery shopping partner to take it. It will cost you more money when you have to shell out for $8 for vegan cheese, and they somehow talk you into buying yourself a $12 conditioner, but it is an investment that will reap dividends when it comes time to carry the groceries up your steep driveway.

For $12, I'm expecting miracles.

Candle Holders

This summer, we had a heatwave that was unheard of in our part of British Columbia. Imagine my surprise upon pulling our Christmas decorations out of the attic yesterday and finding my Christmas candles adhered to the plastic bag they were in. These particular snowflake candle holders bring me joy every year. A dear friend who lives in another part of the world gave them to me one year for Christmas. I think of her every time I unwrap them which I did right after I said "What the ?" After peeling them out of their waxy cocoon, I placed them into a pot of boiling water. Getting little nonsense jobs like this accomplished makes me feel great even if my candles still have wax on them and so does my pot, my dishtowel, and the tongs I was using. Spreading it around like that did lessen the clumps on the candlesticks so they are more presentable at least.

No germs on my decorations.

Memorable Ornaments

Many people get great delight around setting up their Christmas tree, but admittedly I tackled it last night with a slight edge of irritation. I had baked a gingerbread loaf with the subtle plot of gathering people around me who would decorate my tree with me. Instead, they had zero guilt about wandering by me and my boxes of decorations back to their respective rooms, computers, tablets with their mouths full, and comments of “yummmm.” While I enjoyed their appreciative tones, I will be smarter next time and dole out the gingerbread loaf after I get the help. Kind of like how you don’t bring out the pizza and the beer until everyone has finished moving the furniture in from the moving van.

That being said, my sweet daughter arrived home, and she is always wonderful for a helping hand decorating. Fresh from a 10-hour shift, she jumped in to help, and she commented how she liked the way we put ornaments on that reminded us of memories rather than a fashion tree. Being a fashion tree is something I have never been accused of. Everything I own is a memory...let's start with my socks. =)

Anyhow, our Christmas tree growing up was the same way. Covered with cookie-cutter decorations and the styrofoam apple with teeth marks from the year our dog tried to eat it, every ornament was a walk through memory lane. I love trees like that. Oohing and awing over a beautiful tree is fun, but I’ll take a memory tree any day…the tackier the better.

One of my cuter memory ornaments from my daughter's drawing years.

There, that’s better. The angst is gone, and my soul feels cleansed. This post feels more me….a flash into my day or days…moments of joy…lots to be grateful for…and a new comprehension of being gaslit.

I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights.

- Maya Angelou

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